I was in Sentosa today and I have a new dream.
One day I will stay in Sentosa- I wish to rent a house there. I always am in love in Sentosa. When I was younger, I used to enjoy the moments there.
I'm secretly a beach girl. Being in the beach gives a romantic feeling and I always love water.
Thank you God for the dream and I'll work towards it.
Be like that - Three doors down. This song seems like a simple song about dreams.
Its funny. I dreamt of this song. The song has a special sound. The guy wants to be in the shoes of a simple minded girl living in a quiet town of her own. She looks at the glamour of superstars, wishing that she can be one.
On the other hand, the superstar, a guy is dreaming how great it would be to have a simple mind like the girl as he has went through lots of drama in life.
Both are dreaming to be like the vice versa. O believe that this song has a great meaning to it. It shows how much humans need each other and that we should be more forgiving to each other.
Everyone experiences pain and life. This song reminds me that good hearts deserve to be connected, despite how tough and famous a person looks. Everyone with good hearts deserve a life of transformation, a second Life.
I had a strange dream about Magic last night.
I dreamt that I was at this place. My mum and brother were there and it was a place that we could see what the future holds in our lives. It was a place of magic- definitely nothing to do with God but the evil one.
It was a dark dream.
I also had to pass through this black mountain, like a tunnel through it. It was a mountain of Hell.
As I was passing through it in like a rollercoaster form, I could feel the weight and heaviness in that mountain. It was a really unpleasant feeling. I could feel the souls trapped in that mountain, the devils and heaviness in their souls could be felt as I passed through the mountain.
After that, I couldn't remember what happened but I guess that's the end of the dream.
Perhaps God is trying to tell me that many will be in that mountain and that we who believe in God will be tested. We will definitely meet devils on our way and to remain a light to people despite what is going on in this world.
The world is changing.
Some businesses are closing, opening for new forms of businesses.
Some people lose, some people gain new perspective and some people win.
In times like these, it shows how vulnerable human beings are.
Entertainment has reached to almost zero. And so, people are lost that there is nothing to blame or nothing to cover their weaknesses.
So the devils in this world find themselves kinda stranded in their own planet, resulting to more chaos or looking at other means to tear the world down.
The world of devil and angels are real.
I've heard of the squid game and I was thinking to myself. It is a reality of our world.
A battle of money and your soul.
Money is portrayed kinda in a bad light but I felt that the point of the story is not to portray money in a bad light but how much human beings are attached to figures and a life of the material world.
What are my true feelings for high end brands.
Honestly, I love them alot.
I see the beauty in them, the craftsmanship and the feeling of them is an exquisite feeling.
But when I think about the price and how much a bag can feed a whole dozen of children or help a grab/taxi driver for a month, I retreat on that idea of owning one- When I wealthy :)
In my head, I wish for them to be mine without paying a penny heee... Like sponsored or sth.
I love the feeling of Dior/ Chanel and many other high end brands
Perhaps I will only own one Chanel bag when I reach my goal of wealthy.
Though I love them alot, I do feel that the idea that it is a fashion brand and that more designs will for sure come out in the near future, it will trap you into purchasing more and living up to that 'lifestyle' that people love to have.
One thing I will indulge other than staycations from time to time is my time in TWG.
I love the feeling of TWG.
It makes me feel like I'm royalty hee
Sipping tea there always gives me a feeling of luxury
I used to have dreams of having really long hair like a doll.
I always thought that long hair will make me look better. I realised that it is not always the case. With long hair, I kinda look messier.
So my dreams of having long silky chiobu hair has ended and I have cut my hair short now. haha.
I always thought that only long hair will make a lady look like chio but I've begin to appreciate shorter hair.
New hair, new beginning.
I used to keep that feeling of criticism in me. When there are negativity around me.
God told me to forgive. I learnt to be generous but at the same time be weary of my surroundings so that the devil cannot trick me.
I slept the whole day today as I'm recovering from my second vaccine dose.
I slept like a baby today. I realised that I have changed so much ever since God saved me and made me understand my true self.
At this time of our lives, most people are in a negative spiral due to the rising number of covid cases. Whoever can come out of this spiral will learn to be stronger when everything subsides.
I used to eat alone way back when covid didn't happen. At times, I did feel alittle awkward but due to my job nature, I'm always on the move from house to house, teaching my students.
I have gotten used to the idea of being alone. The more society isn't doing well, the more negativity in the air.
The blame game people like to play.
I pray that the good ones are able to emerge stronger. The transition happens to be a longer one and that straightens our perspective in life.
Recently, I saw on Radiotools that my song was aired on TV in Russia for 10 Seconds. It triggered a series of radio stations playing my newer songs on Radio.
I firmly believe that God is using me to reach people who are searching for God. Like a vessel, my music or msg might have reached out to the people of the world.
Last time, I have always wanted to make people feel happy, bring a smile on people's faces but that is an outdated way of pleasing people and pleasing people isn't necessarily good for the soul
My music ironically is the way to go
I thank God for this and all the riches of this is thanks to God. He is using me as a way to reach people in their hearts.
I believe that the riches in this world is hidden in people's hearts. I always wanted to express myself through my expressions and wishes to bring light to people through my feelings but I realised that the devil takes advantage of this when they see you in emotions.
I learn to be more polka face due to my experiences with this spiritual world of enemies. I pray for the good hearts to remain a warrior and to follow God through footsteps of faith guided by his presence.
Covid is sure a test
With so many Businesses affected by this pandemic, its easy to put the blame on people or things.
It really is a test for all on Earth right now.
The last days perhaps could be the last days of seeing our faith tested.
The future is meek
A new Beginning perhaps only for those who can survive this leap of faith
The world now is definitely not shining like a diamond at all.
If the world isn't, it is also not the right time to shine.
The right time to really shine is when God finds it for you.
The world can be a place of misery
God will take care of those who follows him.
I used to want to save the whole world in my own way
Now, I've realised that I can't save the whole world because it is a spiritual world of all kinds.
I can't necessarily save the devil but only show the way through the way I am.
I love hotels so much. From young, I always love going to the resorts and the first thing I look forward to is how the hotel looks like. There's something about hotels that I love. I think it is the decor, the aircon, the feeling of heaven on Earth.
I love hotels so much. I know hotels are not reality of life but I hope that the future of houses will be like our present hotels, so cozy, high end and so attractive.
I wanna marry hotels hee. Joking.
I was watching a Youtube video about this guy who moved to Bali, his dream home ended up feeling depressed though it was his dream to be there for years.
This kinda made me reflect about my life. I always thought of beaches, laid back life like the dream life that I sought as my environment. I still wanted to be able to work and do the things that I love doing but his video kinda got me thinking that perhaps the 'dream life' is not that fantastic after all.
In the past, I visited many nice houses from students of mine. I used to find their home so glamorous but the more I visit their house, I learn the feeling of existing in their houses and realise that reality of a dream house might not be what we envisioned like in dreams.
You see the nice exteriors and all but when you live in it, the exteriors suddenly hit that there are bills to pay, conflicts might still exist in their families and life goes on. We still need to earn money and survive in this earthly world.
Thus, people are always in a chase for dollars.
This can be unhealthy. The material world ends up owning the lives of many and with Covid happening, more people are more concerned if they can continue the same lifestyle that they are living (for those hit by the restrictions)
The only way I feel to be out of this rat race of chasing for money is to look to God. He provides...
I thank God for showing me a new vision I had.
I think that the future is still bright, despite what's happening right now.
God is flushing out sins and exposing the evil so that the new can make way.
I thank God for this vision. I saw hope in this earth and more of his plans unveiling the coming years.
I pray for the righteous and that they will gain new positions so that life will be a better one for everyone.
I see history of mankind in a good light right now. Answers are in history and I thank God for revealing that to me
My days in a global preschool were one of my best moments when I felt like the people were different and had a uniqueness in it. They were a community of God I felt.
I used to love playing music in the mornings of work. I enjoyed it so much and saw so much love in the cute kids in school, as if they were my own.
I was pretty introvert but that job really made me more confident and I loved most of the people there, especially the kids.
I missed the community working there. Although I was not very outspoken, I connected with the parents and kids there in my own mind.
I think the love and warmth I had all came from God. I didn't know how I had that but God planted that in me.
I also had fun teaching the cute kids in my past music school, Staccato.
I had really cute kids I connected with like Kylie, Laurel Tan, Asher. They were the cutest kids.
I loved that the most during my full force days of teaching.
Listening to 'Maps', it brought back memories. I remember a friend I knew in the past. It was a mutual friend of a church friend. He had a girlfriend at that time so I didn't wanna barge in.
I was drawn by him through his taste of music and I felt like God made me like him. I do not know what about him but I was drawn perhaps due to God.
I saw wonders in certain beings in the past and all was done by the works of God. I myself didn't know how certain situations made way to my life.
I now know that most of my feelings are made through the plannings of God.
Do you know that Cinderella stories. My view of it is that there is no such thing as fairy god mother. The prince is not really a prince, only a prince in people's eyes. God is the real prince but he is not a human.
As for Cinderella, I feel that she didn't know she was a real princess until God revealed to her. It is not so much about her appearance and the size of her feet that matches the glass slipper.
As for stories like Frozen, Else's story is more realistic in this world of ours. She has super powers and is always learning how to carefully use them. This describes our lives. We are responsible for our own powers and actions.
As for Crazy Rich Asians, I feel that true rich asians aren't really 'rich' in God's eyes but rich in the human world. So it is realistic. However, the idea of The rich guy (can't remember his name) who loved that Asian girl. He is kinda like fooled I felt that the girl loves him for him. He just likes the idea of being down to earth. A girl who can take the power of wealth can't be that simple after all.
So which is the best story you would love to choose amongst the 3. Cinderella, Frozen or Crazy rich asians? For me, I choose Frozen as this has an element of Faith.
Who remembered IRC?
I used to have weird names for my nickname haha. I used nicknames like PEAnutsZz , SeaW33d, TwixX and all sorts of cutie names haha
I remembered my friends, Denise who used her nickname as Slipperz. I used to stay at my grandma house during those days and my group of friends once visited me at my grandma's house.
Effie Chan, I admired her a lot during sec school days. She's originally from Hong kong. Before Sec school days when Toa payoh Social Centre opened up, there was a bubble tea shop called, 'Quickly'. Who remembers?
I would go there with my good friends Clarissa. She was the popular kid in school and thus, I became slightly more visible in people's eyes too coz of her. She was a netballer. Everyone wanted to be like her.
We would go there for bubble tea and she once brought me to her house at Braddell. I met her sister and I remembered those days when I stayed at my Hougang house. We would watch, 'The ring' Movie in my house and we would hide ourselves under the pillow as the Movie was super creepy.
We also went to Pasar Malam near my Hougang house. Clarissa had a second home at Hougang too and those were the fun days that we hung out together at night.
I can't believe time flies so fast. Now I'm already 32. I thank God that I made it till 32.
I have to share the story of my mum who sat next to Wang Lee Hom in SIA business class a long time ago. How cool is that....
He was wearing sunglasses. My mum who was next to him didn't know he was a superstar. There was an uncle who kept looking at my mum's direction. My mum unknowingly thought that he was looking at her. Actually, he was eyeing at Wang Lee Hom.
Hahaha..How cool..My brother once also saw 5566 in the Business class, on the way back from Taiwan to Singapore. Think they were sitting close to him. He didn't ask for their autograph though
I like two songs by Wang Lee Hom. 'Ai de jiu shi ni' and 'Wei yi.' I like his accent.
I myself have not seen any real superstars sadly haha...
Think the only stars I saw were local stars. I was working once in Far east plaza as a sales assistant before my poly days. During the break time when we were entering Poly.
I think it was Carrie Chong, the Radio dj who entered my shop.
I was so excited. I remembered there was this blue hair guy who used to work at the hairdresser near my shop. He used to say hi to me ocassionally. At that time I also made friends with another girl near my shop. She was also selling apparels.. Those were great days. David, my church friend also visited me once with his friend Chris. And my crush, Brandon once met me there. He was also working as a sales assistant at Ashworth at Suntec city. I was so smitten by him that I went all the way to his shop at Suntec city to give him a chocolate that looked like a ladybird. Think his friends in the shop must be thinking I'm so crazy haha.
Hi Everyone, currently I'm on work from home. Hope everyone is staying safe.
I've been tiktoking. You can find me there too or you can also use my music on Tiktok if you liked. :)
I don't really have much to say as I haven't been out lately due to the covid situation.
So not happening at all.
just learning to appreciate my life more and not always ask God for this and that. Ultimately, as long as we have a roof on our head at this time of our lives with Covid, it is already a blessing
With the pandemic worsening, I'm so relieved and thankful to God that he has made my brother's wedding come true.
It was a very intimate wedding dinner, with up to 50people in the ballroom. I felt so honoured and privileged to be sitting in the 'VIP table' as it usually consists of close ones on that table.
I felt in my earlier days of life, I have not always been put in the best light, especially during my poly and Teenage days. I was struggling to find out who I was and was not necessarily surrounded by the best of influence. I don't blame the people around me as I too was discovering myself. I was constantly influenced by the devil on the way I looked at things as well as the spiritual attacks that I'm vulnerable to. I believe that God's children are usually more targeted at in life as devils usually attack them the first.
It was my first time I felt like God spoke to me when my brother was showing his gratitude in his speech to his close ones when he was onstage. And that God was honouring me in a good light. I felt like my finance situation was ironically a good thing that happen because it made me focus on what was important in God's eyes.
He didn't want me to get distracted by all the flamboyant material things in life. God was clearly present in yesterday's day. He knew me too well.
The wedding was filled with a vibrancy of people that I felt happy to be surrounded in.
I thank God for this experience.
Who loves the smell of air after rain?
Who loves aircon when you just had a walk outside in the hot sunny weather?
Who loves the sights of lush greenery and sounds of crickets?
Who loves the sights of Christmas twinkling light in the night cold crisp air?
Who loves the feeling of wearing your best clothes in the cool weather?
Me meemememememe.... :)
Everything in life goes down.
Its not easy to be faithful to God
Tests are everywhere. The strongest in faith survives, not the most popular girl or boy in town.
I'm not surprised that only a few remains in the field ploughing... and if there's a new world.
The devil wins earth but the godly ones will leave and be with him.
I'm saddened that a human's purpose of living is slowly dissipating despite the idea of positivity and children on Earth that is suppose to give us meaning in life.
I do believe that the last days are coming.....In terms of the spiritual world.
I heard on Youtube that it's not easy to get songs onto radio. I recently signed up an analytics tool and found out that some of my songs got onto international radio. I'm really grateful for the kind radio promoters who helped me get my songs onto radio.
This can only happen coz of God. I thank him for helping me get songs into radio. Thanks to the kind souls too for choosing my songs. I love you.
Weird how I had a craving for oatmeal today.
I bought banana, walnuts and milk all to make oatmeal for many breakfasts.
:)
I remembered those days when I lived with my grandparents in Toa payoh.
They would have that for supper. Oatmeal with biscuit. I kinda miss the simple life and miss my grandma and grandpa.
My grandpa is still alive but he has kinda lost his memory.
My grandma is in heaven, watching us from afar. She was a very strong woman. I frequently talk about my day during secondary school days to them and they are always gladly listening to my stories, gossips included. haha.
I used to be pretty negative in secondary school days but still appreciate life and the short naps in one of the two rooms in the house.
It is a tiny flat but had great memories of Grandpa reading newspaper, watching Chinese news at 10pm I think and after that, they will get ready to sleep.
They also frequently listen to the radio news and watch Chinese drama shows. It was a nostalgic feeling and I will always appreciate the days with my grandparents.
When you are stubborn and just be a good follower in God, people will definitely dislike you. People only want their ego to be boosted most of the time. If you don't adhere to their wishes, they can use what they know of you and just make themselves feel good by gossiping about you.
And so, that's the reason why People who have a mind of their own get criticised and persecuted for no reason.
Last time, I thought that only ladies like to gossip. I now know that both men and women like to gossip. Those that seek attention especially and feel like they are losing out.
Humans like to be in a world of popularity. I used to be like that when I was younger. I feel like I 'died' so many times so much so that now, I just live my life. At times, the devils distract you by making you feel small. The devils rob and destroy because they think that they are the best and no one can be better than them.
I'm just glad that I have a chance to be alive and wishes to be out of human's drama.
Ever since the Covid happened, there is less emphasis on Fashion and Luxury.
However, I feel that it will come back and emerge stronger than ever.
I'm thinking to myself, what would I love doing other than Music?
My next interest is actually Fashion and looking nice in comfortable luxurious clothes
Last time, I did a video on youtube talking about how I felt about Luxury and that one day brands might disappear.
I felt that Music and Fashion go hand in hand. The future could be a mix of collabs with Musicians.
Musicians Image is important to their fans and I think Collabs with Musical Artist will be the next big thing.
We'll see :)
Last time when I was working as a Piano teacher full time, I spent the bulk of my money on clothes.
Although I have given away many of my old clothes, what shopping taught me is priceless from my perspective.
It taught me about my own personal style.
I felt like now is not the time to be enjoying as my fruits of labour have not been seen yet.
In some ways, it's like going through the desert in life right now.
God wants me to understand that. The covid has shown that God can put deserts suddenly in places even where there's abundance.
We can't always rely on what we see and temptations are always there with Advertisements. I think that I need to be healed by God in some aspect of my life. That what I should be looking for in life is not the material things and food.
Satisfaction and Gratitude should come from inside. The riches will come when it is suppose to come. I should not let money dictate when it should come but focus on the journey and appreciate the things that comes in its way.
I went to France for holiday about 9 years ago and really love Paris. Its so romantic. I get happy just by walking down the streets of Paris.
Perhaps that is what Gratitude should be. Enjoying the journey in life and appreciating the simple things in life such as the weather, the architecture and life as a whole.
I love Europe. The idea of Paris to me is a perfect way of living as well as the cool weather.
I secretly think that I'm a snowman deep inside me. I like to eat ice cubes and I like aircon.
I even composed a song called 'Snowman' years back because I relate to being a snowman.
I have took down that album because it was one of my first albums.
Grant Cardone says that rich people look at their figures everyday. I look at my figures and realised that I can't apply that to my life. Looking at the figures on my side seems more discouraging than encouraging.
I need to live like my days in school, in CHIJ. Everyday I have only like 2 to 6 dollars and I'm happy.
I don't even think about money and I was more wealthy in the past than the present. How ironic.
You know Sg looks so modern, advanced and nice in the exterior. I feel like my life is kinda like overrated in its exterior. Deep inside me, I feel like I don't deserve such a nice environment, as if I was not meant to enjoy the infrastructure of Sg.
I don't think its gotta do with my self esteem but more of where my soul came from. I feel that I should be living a life of necessity and the rest should be used for my music and for people who truly needs the wealth.
I think I have to promise myself to cut on spending money outside so much. I feel like my adventure on my off days are not well deserved. There are people who don't even have food on the table and here I am outside finding the meaning of life. I don't think its wrong to discover oneself but I think that perhaps my life was meant to be more focus and less distracted by the exteriors of the world.
I need to make a promise to God that one day when the wealth pours into my life that I have to spend it wisely and responsibly. No wasting of $ in restaurants, no entertainment and no going to MBS to feel wealthy all the time.
I'm not sure why I like going to MBS. Maybe its an escapism of reality. I'm not sure. I have to make a promise to God that I only spend on my Music, eat simply and focus on my own personal growth.
I wish to grow inside. I have to focus on:
gratitude
No staycations for me
Once my money start to build up, I have to make sure that that goes to my future.
1. To save for a roof on my head.
I'm learning how to appreciate everything around me.
Like a baby, I lose in $ to gain a new perspective.
I'm yearning for an appreciation of life.
Last time, I loved the idea of being in atas restaurants because I like the feeling of Wealth. Now that I know what it feels like to be wealthy in the environment, I'm taking money as an opportunity to re-look my life.
I thank God for giving me many chances in life to redeem myself though I'm still a sinner.
My blog has been blowing up. I thank all the viewers here for reading my life as well as my aspirations and weird dreams hee.
I'm a 32 year old Singaporean Chinese who actually just wishes to live a life that God wants her to live.
Most people say that they wish to make a change in the world. Me? I wish that more people get to know that people do not need to live in fears and conform to societies.
I believe that the future will be a digital one. As today is Good Friday, I pray that more people will be able to see the light. There's a lot of things going on in the world but we should as humans have more faith and to still be grateful of life.
What do I do right now? I'm currently working in a Music school in Town doing Administrative work. I also teach Piano during my off days, close friends. At the same time, I'm trying to get the word out there of my song compositions.
I have been composing many songs for the past 3-4 years and this year, I wish to spread the word of my Music.
Most of my songs are short songs, 2 mins or less. I wish to bring out a certain feel in every short piece. My current most streamed song is 'Beautiful day'. This song has a calm feel so if you are having a stressful day, this is the song to listen to.
I will continue to write here so that my listeners can continue to know me and journey with me in my life as well as my thoughts.
As for fans of my music, give the glory to God. I don't like the idea of being idolised. I wish that more people give honour to God for what they do and not for themselves.
It's funny how my blog is gaining more traction lately.
I wished my songs could get as much traction as my blog. I guess its because I pinned my thoughts down and my learning process of life is appealing to the audience.
Also, I'm not trying to monetise everything, unlike the music. Not everyone might like my genre of music too.
Something told me to continue writing. And so, I'm hoping to write more.
I realised that my insecurities surfaced because I don't behave like most people. I think ordinary people live more through their eyes. I live more through my instinct, feel and intuition. Also, God is one reason that I believed in strongly.
For those who do not believe in God, do you know how I started my faith?
It is through awakenings. What do I mean by awakenings? Sometimes when I nap or sleep, I sometimes get a flashback of my life or like a flashback of a clock in my existence.
I believe that God is the only one who can plant flashbacks. That only happens when you believe in him.
I used to think that I was being too selfish when I walk through in life. I sometimes don't like looking at people in the streets when I walk. It is not because I wish to ignore people.
I believe that life should be blurred and life should be lived by faith. It should not always be about sight and how the other person feels about you.
Money is meant to hide or show off a person.
How did I come out with this theory?
Material things are meant to be bought from wealthy people. Things such as restaurants, cafes etc..They are meant to amplify a person's character. That is why people find it so attractive to live the lifestyle life.
Currently, I'm not in that situation where I can 'show off' my lifestyle and one thing I've also realised that all this lifestyle that we love, it is so attractive that it burns our pocket really fast.
With my current situation right now, I'm beginning to realise why I spent relentlessly in the past. I didn't know the value of money and how to use it the right way. I was impulsive and trapped in that feel good for that moment and that 'you only live once' in your life kinda mentality.
With this 'fasting' of money from my life, I learnt that $$ is like a cushion. But you only deserve that cushion if you learn to sleep on hard floor. Then, you will realise how bless you are to have pillows and blankets.
Gratitude will be my next album's name
I'm grateful for life in general.
I'm thankful to be alive.
Since young, I knew it was a cold hard world that we live in. People choose wealth, popularity, fame and all things aimless.
I used to be inquisitive that I surrounded myself with all the colorful people around me. You know that word culture, it comes from people and what I did was surround myself with all the culture so that I understand what the world is.
It was like a survival for me. I knew this world was not an easy world to be living in. It is a tough world of drama like 'Kin' on Channel 5 series.
I used to remember listening to ghostly music when I was young and it really scared the wits out of me. Every time a commercial is being aired, the radio or tv always use a very dark scary low toned voice to feature the products. It gave me a sense of fear since young.
My surroundings too from young, already gave me an indication that this world is not for the faint hearted. And so, I lived a life of fear and insecurities.
I rather blame myself for the things that happen around me than blame it on others as I knew that I do not not what was going on in God's mind.
As I grew older, I then understood the complexities of human behaviour and wants. People who always portray a perfect life, you can easily sniff out that it is fake. People who went through hardship will know that life is not what is perceived on pictures.
I then wonder what is the purpose of wealth when the world is so sinful. I rather be wealthy in a sinless world. Perhaps that is the reason why God says that people who follow him will have what they need, not what they want.
I pray that God will save more people in this world before the world goes to a world of hell and our own device.
I used to think that spending money and promoting my social media is the way to go for a Musician like myself.
I spent too much that I didn't keep for myself. I thought that people and the people around me needs it more than me.
And so, I've been living with little right now and it has kinda humbled me that I don't need alot to be breathing.
I love helping people but I realised that even when you help people, some people aren't grateful for your help. There are others who love you for helping but not all are appreciative.
I used to think that going out makes life worthwhile. Experiencing life in different forms of settings will help color a person's life.
It definitely makes life more interesting but I realised my real purpose to go out is to create content and at the same time give back to others.
My current situation has really humbled me. What I hope for the future is that I'm able to help others perhaps in a different way, not necessarily spending it to help people but perhaps giving it to people who genuinely appreciates your heart for it and people who really need it.
